Researchers at University of California, Berkeley have utilized current events to clearly link Climate Change as the root cause of everything negative. Professor Hal Bungster introduced the results of the study and titled it “the seven degrees of Climate Change” after the strange connection the actor Kevin Bacon has to every entertainment on tv and film in the last 25 years.
Bungster demonstrated the results of his exhaustive study by starting with a recognizable historical event. “Hillary Clinton sets up her private server . . . Bill claims he has only sent 2 emails in his life. Bill was the governor of the State of Arkansas . . . Arkansas is a rural midwestern state. Rural states rely on good rainfall . . . In Arkansas there has been a lot more rain . . . ergo . . . Climate Change. Syria crosses President Obama’s “red line” . . . The evidence is the chemical weapons were barrel bombed on Syria’s own people. The chemical weapons spread through the wind streams in the lower atmosphere . . . Wind speeds and directions, although mostly typical, sometimes change speed and direction . . . again . . . Climate Change.
The results have surprised political pundits because they cross both sides of the isle. Scott Walker and Rick Perry recently suspended their Presidential campaign. Both candidates wore a particular brand of white wool shirts from China. China’s temperature has measured in the normal range for the last decade . . . except in the factories where child labor is incorporated. Those temperatures are thought to be .00001 degree warmer contributing to . . . Climate change.
Climate deniers refuse to accept these clear examples of action-reaction. Professor Bungster feels that if our nation were to recognize the connection we all would be living in nirvana in no time at all. “Every one with any common sense recognize that climate change is the cause of everything bad – especially conservatives” A website for seven degrees of climate change to allow citizens to share their own research and examples.
Kevin Bacon could not be reached for comment.