Football Game Breaks Out in the Middle of McCaskey-York Gunfight

A high-stakes territorial gun fight in Buchanan Park was unexpectedly cancelled Saturday night when 4 unidentified youth started an impromptu tag football game in the middle of the action.

Nineteen-year old, McCaskey freshman, Dookie Washington told POL that he was severely shocked and traumatized by the sudden appearance of an in-flight Nerf football that missed his shooting hand by mere inches.

York High’s, Peanut McMurphy complained that his ears were still ringing 2 hours later from the loud screaming of “Shlitz!” which occurred every time the defense faked a blitz against the quarterback.

After approximately 15 minutes of unrelenting tag football action, members of the two feuding high schools decided to cancel the remainder of the melee and go home. Although a make-up massacre has not yet been confirmed, members from both sides agreed that they wouldn’t let something as stupid as a football game get in the way of them killing each other.