Phillies Manage to Score 3 Runs on Baltimore Using Only Cardboard Cutouts

Well, it looks like the joke’s on Baltimore. Last night what seemed like a 19 -3 victory for the Orioles turned into a real pie-in-the-face moment when it was revealed this morning that the entire Philadelphia Phillies team never made it to Camden Yards and instead substituted cardboard cutouts of the team.

So lifelike! Image :

“I was ok with using the cardboard cut outs, I know my batting average would stay where it is, plus I was too busy shooting Subway commercials” Said Ryan Howard, who’s cardboard cut out when 0 for 3 at bat in last evenings game.

The Phillies manager revealed that they didn’t feel like showing up to the game, and that they had better things to do and that this time would be better spent on player promotion.

“It was almost like the Phillies didn’t show up to the game, then it turns they didn’t! Hahaha, they had us all fooled”, said lifelong James McIntyre.

Last night marks the Phillies’ 7th loss in a row in a score that would normally get people fired.