Sinkholes, Confederate Flags, And People With Poor Judgment, Mayor Leo Lutz’ Day On Walnut Street Hatches Plan To Solve All Columbia’s Problems

While how the Confederate Flag incident began yesterday remains up for debate, for Mayor Lutz how to solve the problem is crystal clear.

Some reports say a racist in a pickup with a Confederate flag taunted and baited a group of black kids in front of their homes. Other reports say a God fearing, fun loving, patriotic man proudly displaying a historic flag as a symbol of liberty and individual rights was mercilessly attacked by a group of uninformed people that misunderstood his symbol while visiting a local drug store.

Probably neither report is truly correct and the truth is most likely somewhere in the middle. What is crystal clear is the behavior of all involved is just one more embarrassment to the town of Columbia. Regardless of what provocations either side felt yesterday’s incident was uncalled for.

For Mayor Lutz though yesterday was inspirational. As the police incident was going on the good mayor came out to see what was happening in his town.

While on the scene Mayor Lutz was quickly cornered by a group of Walnut St residents that had been recently complaining to the borough office about a sinkhole opening up on the street. They felt they were being ignored and took the opportunity to make the mayor look for himself.

Mayor Lutz did look. Then he went home and ordered a giant bulldozer to be delivered late summer 2016. In the meantime the borough will continue to ignore the sinkhole and allow it to grow.

Additionally the mayor commissioned a study to identify everything that is wrong with Columbia. The mayor started the list with his own personal pet peeve Club Good Times, but said he will leave everything else up to the commission. The commission’s report is due 1 week before the giant bulldozer is scheduled to arrive.

Mayor Lutz plans to drive the bulldozer himself and shove everything that is wrong with Columbia in that sinkhole.

The Worlds Biggest Earth Mover the LeTourneau L-2350 is  Mayor Lutz key to solving Columbia's Problems
The Worlds Biggest Earth Mover the LeTourneau L-2350 is Mayor Lutz key to solving Columbia’s Problems

All problems solved, including the sinkhole which should easily be completely filled.

Mayor Lutz believes not only will the hole be filled, but it could become a rather sizable mound. That’s okay though he said. We can cap it with concrete, cover it with dirt, plant some grass, flowers and trees. We will have a very nice park.